Dear Cadbury,

Last year at this time I was searching the supermarket aisles in a fruitless attempt to find your Mini Eggs. There had been "runs" on stores where a shipment had just arrived, literally cleaning them out in minutes. I was suddenly picturing frantic shoppers and Englishmen ready to mob small children with the 'one golden ticket'. One store in particular even put a limit on the number of bags you could buy. Is this some sort of chocolate revolution being masterminded from behind the scenes of some selfish dictator? I was afraid. I could not be a part of a world where supply and demand of chocolate were perilously out of balance. We've all experienced shortages in our lifetime. Recent natural disasters and simple bad weather have affected a plethora of essentials, like Kale. But this was serious. Until last week. Last week I was perusing the aisles of a local Smiths Food & Drug. I was astonished to stumble upon a veritable tower of Cadbury Mini Eggs. And they were on special. In a moment of pure restraint or possible insanity I purchased ONE bag. One bag. Had I so quickly forgotten the tragic events of last spring? Perhaps. Or maybe I was just shopping on a full stomach. Good for the budget, bad for future supplies. As I pop one button on my pants & mini egg number 15 in my mouth for the day I ask Scott an important question. "I can't decide if I should go and buy some more or not?" If he says yes he is encouraging my feeding frenzy and assuring me that our vows of love are still important to him. If he says no, well, then obviously he thinks I am getting fat and it is all for the best. Poor guy. But he just snickered and watched me pop egg number 16 into my chubby little cheeks. Cadbury, I blame you. If for instance you would acknowledge the publics year-round need for this "Easter delicacy" then I believe my pioneer gene would stop kicking in, thus convincing me that I need a two-year supply. This is not empty rhetoric. I illustrate with an example of my good friend Debbie who, last year, was fortunate enough to travel to Nevada where luck was on her side. Instead of a slot machine of coins she happened upon a store full of Cadbury Mini Eggs. She brought enough home to "can" them. As food storage. In her basement. Genius.

All I am asking is this. Simply change the color and shape of the shell after the Easter season is over. Mars has successfully made M&M's a year-round candy by simply changing colors. And people actually buy them in red & green at Christmas-time even if they have a leftover bag from Halloween. I know. As I visited your websiteI couldn't help noticing that your web developers thought of nearly everything. It is the website equivalent of a Pied Piper for chocolate lovers. There are contests, people sharing their sweet nicknames like Sugarduck and Wibbles? There is an eye-catching set of tabs leading you to well thought-out historical pages, recipes, and a place called Chocolate World? There are enticements for products I have NEVER EVEN SEEN. But oh I want to. Candybars called the Curlywirly, Bournville, and the Boost. With bright wrappers and mouth-watering descriptions. Where do I go to find theses chocolates? But I digress. Perhaps. Here’s my point: I could not find a single illustration or link to the Mini Egg. Are you avoiding this topic? Is there a joke in the U.K about how those stupid Americans think the Mini Egg is the best invention ever? What are you keeping from us? I mean other than a constant supply of what we really want. You deliberately choose to import these addictive little candy-coated confections once a year? And so I eat well beyond my ability to exercise it off. Where is the logic? Where is the business sense? Where is the humanity?